Megaman 11 Review (PS4)

It's that time again.  Time to take up your arm cannon, blast some robots, and once again challenge the series that won't die.  This is Megaman 11.

Megaman 11 is the next entry in a series that is easily one of my favorite ever.  Some games are better than other, but they're all robot-blasting fun for the most part.  So, how does this one stack up?  Let's dive in and find out.

Megaman is back to whup some robot ass.

At its base, it's the same Megaman action you've played many times before.  A little shooting here, a little platforming there, you know the drill.  Pick a level, make your way through it, whup the ass of the boss and steal his weapon, then move on to whup somebody else's ass.  As mentioned before, it's largely the same, right down to the difficulty.

Some puzzles are so easy, they'll put Megaman to sleep...

...while others will leave him scared and confused.

You may have guessed, but this game is as relentless as an angry pit bull.  There are beatings and rape waiting for you on every level.  A lot of the challenge comes from sucker punches, like falling into spikes you can't see until you hit them or an enemy stunning you, causing you to get killed by a forest fire or fall into a bottomless pit.  The challenge is further boosted by extremely long levels, terrible checkpoints, and random fuckshit.  It's fair for the most part, though.

Beware of bullshit.

If you take a single hit, the fire will catch up and instantly kill you.

The bosses, on the other hands, are easy by comparison.  You can beat them if you have two or three lives when you meet them (one to get slaughtered while you learn their pattern and another to hand their ass to them).  They're all perfectly beatable as your first pick, even if their levels aren't.

There are eight new asses to kick here.

The game's main gimmick is the new twin gear system, which enables you to briefly boost your speed (by slowing everything else down) or attack power.  This can be useful in tricky situations (like those stone grinder puzzles in Block Man's level).  This system can even affect your special weapon, changing how they shoot.  You can use it from the onset, when you want, as often as the cooldown period will let you.

If Dr. Light's explanation of the Double Gear system doesn't cut it for you...

...you can try it out for yourself in a tutorial.

If you're having trouble, you can always stop off at Dr. Light's Lab to give yourself an extra boost.  You can buy lives, E tanks, parts, and more.  The more hardcore players will probably laugh at such a thing, but newcomers and scrubs alike will be happy it's there.

The shop has useful items for those who are struggling.

Well, onto the little stuff.  The graphics are quite flashy.  It seems to be an update of Megaman 8's graphics, with crisp and cute look throughout.  There are big, flashy explosions that make it seem like Michael Bay had a hand in making this game.  Megaman's appearance (not just his color) changes when using different weapons.  You can also stun enemies with shields, leading to a mildly funny stun animation.  

Special weapons give Megaman the ability to strut down the catwalk as well as new powers.

Even enemies with shields aren't safe from a good ol' charged shot.

The music is among the weakest in the entire Megaman franchise.  In particular, the boss theme blows.  The music isn't terrible or bad compared to other games.  It just isn't up to Megaman standards.  It's still a head-rocking good time, just not as memorable or MP3-worthy as other Megaman soundtracks.  On another note, Megaman voice is irritating when he gets killed.  Seriously, he sounds like Edward Elric having an orgasm.  Just...ugh!

Other stuff includes a challenge mode and a gallery.  Most of the challenges involve going through the main level under differing circumstances.  The gallery is basically an enemy encyclopedia, allowing you to view the enemies in all their cuteness without taking an ass-whuppin'.  It also lets you view the bosses and listen to they lines they spout.  It's all...cute.  Also, it's small, but you now have the ability to leave any level at anytime, even if you haven't beaten the boss.  You won't lose any bolts you've collected or flush lives down the toilet when you want to leave, so feel free quit away.

The Gallery offers a safe look at the enemies, as well as a light description.

Challenges offer new ways to tackle the levels, among other things.

Megaman 11 is neat addition to the Megaman lineup.  It's the same shooting and platforming you know and love, with more flash.  I did like the long levels, but the checkpointing could have been better.  The Double Gear system adds to the formula without changing it.  The music may not be up to par with the rest of the series, but it's still good in it's own right.

Games I Shamelessly Admit I Like

Some games are bad.  Really bad.  Whether its flawed execution, bad design, bad programming, a stupid concept, or something else, some games are a cut below the rest.

Yet there are some bad games that people personally like.  Games deep down inside you know suck.  Every gamer has at least a few of these on their shelve.  These a my top 5 bad games that I enjoy.

1.  Rumble Roses (PS2)

When you think of pro wrestling, big musclemen usually come to mind.  Rumble Roses goes the opposite direction, utilizing a roster of smoking hot women instead.  The roster is pretty small, topping out at 11, but each character has face (good guy) and heel (bad guy) versions that you can switch between by making vows, then breaking them to turn heel or keeping them to turn face.  The game has some neat character themes, though some of the entrances are ridiculous.  The game looks good and the women are genuinely hot.  The gameplay resembles a typical wrestling game, but more barebones.  Don't expect a Create-A-Wrestling mode or anything cool like that.  As a whole, the gameplay is bland and the story is stupid, but it's graphics that make a game like this work.  This one gets passing grades on that front.

2.  Mega Man X6 (PS1)

From the first time I played Blizzard Wolfang's stage, I knew this was a bad game.  Still, I stuck with it for no other reason than that I was a Megaman fan and this was a Megaman game.  While the game never really got good, per se, I did gleam a few morsels of enjoyment from it.  The music is good, the graphics aren't terrible, and the gameplay is intense, as is usually the case with Mega Man games.  Some piss poor design choices, the Nightmare system, and extremely high levels of straight-up bullshit place this one solidly at the bottom of the X series (though that could change once I play X7).

3.  Dead Or Alive Xtreme Volleyball 2 (XB360)

The girls of Dead Or Alive strip down into swimsuits and play a number of games, including volleyball.  Honestly, this game is pretty shitty because the controls are trash.  How bad are they?  Cripplingly bad, especially when playing volleyball.  That's right.  It's a volleyball game where the volleyball is the worst part.  So what's good?  The women in swimsuits, duh.  If you want to drool over the women of DOA and can't grab a copy of DOAX3, this is your game.

4.  Atelier Totori (PS3)

Not a bad game.  A pretty good game in fact.  It's an RPG with a strong time management mechanic.  You take the role of a cute little girl as she travels around a cute little world with her cute little friends, killing cute little monsters while listening to cute little music.  The problem is that sometimes Totori is too girly, sometimes to the point where I say to myself, "I think I'm too old to be playing this game."  It's just an awkward feeling.  But as mentioned before, the game is good.  Plus, Melvia and Ceci are hot.

5.  NBA 2K3 (PS2 & Gamecube)

Here's a real throwback.  This game is 17 years old.  Players constantly miss layup and dunks, sometimes missing as many as five in row.  That is total crap because that would never happen in a real game.  Seriously, just imagine watching a basketball game and watching LeBron James miss five straight dunks in a single game.  How would that look?  Also, there are some AI glitches that happen regularly, like the opposing team inbounding the ball to their point guard, who then decides not to move.  It'll do that for an entire quarter.  It's embarrassing.  Then, sometimes the game will just crash, making this the only PS2/Gamecube (I have both versions) game I've ever played to do this.  Despite all the problems, the game can be fun when it works.  Also, the graphics held up well, with the players and courts still look good.  Against all logic, this is the only basketball game I play on a regular basis.  I've never played NBA 2K19 (2K13 is the most recent one I've played), but I'm still playing 2K3 on the Wii (ah, backwards compatibility) and PS2.  That has to count for something.

And those are five bad games I have a soft spot for.  Four of the five are undeniably bad, but have a level of charm to them.  As mentioned before, Atelier Totori isn't a bad game.  It just makes me feel weird.  So, you could say it's really four bad games and one that makes me feel weird.  Agree?  Disagree?  What are five pieces of crap that you like regardless?  Feel free to comment and have your voice heard.

Videogame Hotties: Kai

She's a sniper.  She has a hat that looks like cat eats.  She has a nice butt.  It's Kai from Valkyria Chronicles 4.

Kai is a cute, but tough little sniper.  On top of having looks, she's an officer, which means using her gives you extra command points.  She can also command a small little group of her own, thanks to the SP system.  Also, as a minor spoiler, Kai isn't her real name, but a name she goes by.  I won't say why, but you better believe she's got a secret.

Look at Kai, standing like a G.

Another secret is what's under that cloak.

Okay...if you say so.

One thing that isn't a secret is her cute hat.

Her "cat ears" are the last thing a dead enemy sees.

Neither is her nice butt.

With a butt like this...

...teammates can't help but grab a handful of it...

...and ignore a perfectly good chest.

Nor is her insatiable appetite for bacon.

She really loves bacon.

We'll see if that changes after her first heart attack.

And her aim can't be beat.

The enemy is up crap creek now.

Poor guy, staring right in the face of his own death.

She's not afraid of a good fist fight.

And she can take a bullet as good as she can give one.

Is this the end of Kai?

She can get overbearing when she wants to.

The dreaded motherly lecture, complete with the raised finger.

That's just because she cares, though.

Ignore the abrasive words.  She cares.

And that's Kai.  She's cute, tough, and caring.  Oh, and her butt isn't bad.  If you want a woman who can blast heads with the best of 'em, she's the one for you.  Check her out in Valkyria Chronicles 4.

Street Fighter 30th Anniversary Collection Review (PS4)

Do you love Street Fighter?  Do you find the series absolutely irresistible?  Well, now you can relive those childhood memories with the Street Fighter 30th Anniversary Collection.

Street Fighter 30th Anniversary Collection is just what is sounds like.  You get to enjoy not one, not two, but twelve classic games in one.  You'll get to see how the series evolved from shitty beginnings in the original Street Fighter to the glorious SNES/Genesis/Arcade days of the 1 million versions of Street Fighter 2 and the Alpha series and even further with the Street Fighter 3 series.

From shit to greatness, it's all here.

There's not much that can be said about the gameplay that hasn't already been said.  You pick a character and beat the crap out of everyone in 1-on-1 combat until you make it to the final boss, then beat the crap out of them, too.  It a simple concept, but it's never been easy.  This is especially the case the original Street Fighter, which is nearly unplayable.

No woman is man enough to fight Guile.

In most Street Fighter games, the controls are fluid.  This is what makes the original Street Fighter so shitty compared to the others.  The controls are terrible, as the character you're playing seems to do whatever they want.  You want to throw a roundhouse?  Too bad, because Ryu doesn't want to do one.  Want to do a shoryuken?  It may come out, but only if Ken feels like it.  Want to jump?  Yeah...you get the point by now.

Another problem the original has that the others don't is the characters.  In the original, you only get two characters; Japan and USA, or Ryu and Ken respectively.  The others have a wide selection of characters.  There are some secret characters in a few of the games, but they're all there.

The original Street Fighter allows you to choose from a whopping TWO characters.

Some characters require a little bullshit to play as.

Okay, I'm done bashing Street Fighter.  Let's take a look at the collection as a whole.  The graphics are as fine as 2D games from the 90s get.  They are kind of pixelated, but these they've held up well for the most part.  As is with most of these retro collections, you have borders at the edges of the playfield which can be turned on/off at your leisure.  They're fine, but a fullscreen resize would have been much appreciated.  Even the fullscreen setting seems a little small until you adjust.  Widescreen seems a little too big, but maybe it's just me.

The widescreen setting is the worst of the three in my opinion.

Cammy's butt has held up well over the years.  Just look how proud of it she is.

The music you love is also back.  Guile's theme doesn't go with everything, but it does go with this game.  I'm a fan of the music from the Street Fight 3 series, but all of the games have good music...except the original game (last time, I swear).  Thank goodness there's a sound test, so you can enjoy these songs without taking an ass whuppin'.

The music is all here.  No need for endless searching.

One notable flaw across the entire collection is the lack of game modes.  You only get the arcade mode and online modes.  This sucks particularly in the case of Street Fighter Alpha 3, as the original PlayStation version had a fun challenge mode that's not present here.  There's nothing outside of the mechanics of each game to shake things up.

The game isn't with SOME extra morsels, though.  As mentioned before, there is a sound test so you can rock your head to the music in peace.  There's concept art, character profiles, and a timeline filled with extra artwork.  A timeline to show how the games in the Street Fighter expanded universe are connected would have been nice, but I guess you can't have everything.  Now that would have been a real treat.  Sadly, there's nothing to unlock and (thankfully) there's no DLC, so what you see is what you get.  You don't have to work for anything.  It's all just given to you.  Whether that's a good thing or not is up to the player.

Everything you ever wanted to know about your favorite characters is here.

Ryu want YOU...to play this game.

Sakura enjoys fighting, thinking about Ryu, and sunsets by the river.

Zangief needs nothing more than his underwear to battle bears and snow.

The in-game save is a great feature these types of games.  It's a good way to pick up where you left off if you're making good progress and you suddenly have to leave or get stuck on a particular opponent.  It's also a good way to cope with M. Bison's cheap tactics and Gill's bullshit, allowing you to walk away when he's starts to get on your nerves and come back when you calm down, which will save your game controller from a collision with the nearest wall.  Purist and the hardcore crowd may scoff at such a thing, but people with less time or patience will be thankful for it.

In the end, Street Fighter 30th Anniversary Collection is a game for Street Fighter purists.  All the games are here in their naked arcade glory.  The game is pretty bare when it comes to game modes and that sucks.  The original Street Fighter is shit, but it's still an important part of the series.  Almost all the games are endless fun.  Check it out.

My Rating System

As you might at the very end of my game reviews, I don't give a number value.  I give a word value instead.  What do all these words mean in numbers?  Allow me to elaborate.  This is my rating system.

Don't Miss It

This is basically my equivalent of the 9-10 score range.  These are darned good games that must be tried at least once by anyone likes videogames.  There's no such thing as a perfect game, but this is as close to perfection as games can get.  Think about games like the Batman Arkham series and Super Metroid and you have an idea of what it takes to get here.

Play It

My 8-9 range.  Great games that may have a tiny flaw or other games do what they do slightly better than them.  You'll go back to them for multiple playthroughs.  Ultra Street Fighter 4 is an example of the games in this range.

Check It Out

My 7-8 range.  Good games that are largely fun.  There's a flaw or two, but they are massively outweighed to the fun factor.  Most games I review will usually fit here.  If you need names, the Dynasty/Samurai Warriors series usually falls here.

Buy With Caution

My 6-7 range.  Most games in this category are good or even great, held back only by one fatal flaw, the most prevalent being an overreliance on DLC.  Games like the overwise flawless Street Fighter 5 series fit solidly in this range.

Give It A Try

My 5-6 range.  Unlike in school, 50% is a passing grade to me.  These are usual good solid or good games that have several flaws (possibly big ones), but are still enjoyable overall.  Games like Mighty No. 9 make their home here.

Not Recommended

My 4-5 range.  Games that are flawed to the point of being broken or nigh unplayable.  What I consider to be the very edge of playability.  They may have a saving grace or some level of charm, but these game largely suck.  Controllers may fly when these games find their way into your console.  Rumble Roses is fine sampling of games in this range.

Pass On It

My 4 and under range.  These games are pretty shitty.  With 1-4 ratings being represented, there are varying degrees of shittiness (not a word, I know).  Some are like stepping on a dog turd barefoot, crappy but survivable or playable even.  Others like going down Crap Creek without a paddle, so shitty that you'll be glad when the experience is over...if you even decide to finish it.  In all cases, the flaws totally negate any good points.  The most redeemable thing is the potential comedic value of these games.  I've had the good fortune of not playing a lot of these, but games like the Game Gear version of Sonic Spinball are stuck here in the shit tier.

And that's my rating system.  You may or may not agree with how I rank some games and that's fine.  I have no problem with disagreements, as long as it's respectful.  As usual, feel free to comment and have your voice heard.

Extinction Review (PS4)

Killing monsters, wall climbing, gliding, and super moves.  What's it all add up to?  It's time to dive into Extinction.

Extinction is a game where you run around a town, killing trolls and rescuing people.  There are man-sized trolls that are easily killed (for the most part).  You also fight giant troll that you kill by slicing them in the back of the neck.  It's like the manga Attack On Titan minus all the charismatic teenagers and Levi.

Speaking of characters, you take the role of Avil, a sword-wielding badass.  As mentioned before, Avil can really get around.  He's able to claim walls like Spiderman, glide like Knuckles the Echidna, tree hop like a ninja, and use a rope to get higher like the kids from Attack On Titan.  The act of maneuvering itself isn't a problem.  Controlling that maneuverability is a slight problem, though.

Our protagonist, Avil.

Avil feels floaty when running.  Also, when wall jumping, it's hard to get down and if you stuck between two buildings, forget it.  And on that note...the tree hopping.  Holy crap.  There are times when you want to just drop to the ground, but your idiot avatar won't let that happen.  He'll just keep tree hopping until he runs out of trees.  It's so...derpy.  It's almost like the game is trying to be more epic than it really is.

The combat is button-mashy when fighting smaller trolls, but not really.  If you just mash buttons, you will take cheap shots and learn how weak Avil really is as some monsters will kill you is three hits.  You can upgrade Avil, but the upgrades do NOTHING.  Those red monsters who can will kill you in three hits at your weakest will still kill you in three hits when you're at your strongest.  Avil simply doesn't feel like he's getting any more powerful.

The only thing upgrading is good for is looking at this cool screen.

Then, you have the battles against giants, which are ripped straight out of Attack On Titan.  You simply climb up the giant's back and decapitate him by slicing the back of his neck with your super move.  It can be tough to get up there with the giant running, jumping, and flailing around, but it can be done.  You can also slice off their arms to keep them from destroying stuff and their legs to keep them from moving around for a bit.  These limbs will grow back, so hurry and cut off the head.  Giants can wear armor, making things slightly more difficult (and a lot more annoying).  Oh yeah, try not to get hit or stepped on as this is usually (not always) instant death.

You can target arms or legs, but slicing off the head is the only way to kill giants.

You don't necessarily fail the mission when Avil dies.  But when the town dies, you fail.  That's right.  The town you fight in has a life bar which goes down when citizens are killed and when the giants destroy buildings.   You can think of it as a time limit of sorts.

When this number hits 0, you're screwed.

Saving to save citizens is a problem.  You find these idiots standing near crystals waiting to either be saved by you or killed by trolls.  Saving them requires you to stand completely still and charge crystals to "beam" them away.  This sucks if an enemy materializes nearby, because they can kill citizens before you can rescue them or attack you, forcing you to stop charging the crystal until you fight them off.  Also, citizens often get killed and you can't do anything about it.  Either you won't know where they are or you simply won't be able to get to them before they are killed.  You simply won't be able to save everyone.  Luckily, none of them are important, so fair enough.

When saving citizens, pray that a troll doesn't wander past and kill them and/or you.

Outside of the main campaign, you get three additional game modes; Daily Challenge, Extinction, and Skirmish.  These shake things up a little, but they are largely the same.  Kill monsters, save the town, and try not to get killed doing it.

Well, on to the little stuff.  The controls are good, but you can't change them.  All you can do is look at them.  The button layout is perfectly fine, but it would have been nice for players who don't like it to change it.

You may or may not like these controls, but you'd better get used to them.

The graphics are alright, just not what I was expecting.  Everything looks too bright for such a dark subject.  I expected something darker and grittier.  The enemies don't look threatening, but slightly silly.  The cutscenes remind me of Avatar the Last Airbender, which is nowhere near being a bad thing.

Big trolls don't look too intimidating, but they can one-hit KO you.

The cutscenes are pretty good.

The music is pretty forgettable.  I think there's music, but I really don't remember.  I can't tell you whether or not it's good or shitty.  Seriously the only song I remember is on the title screen, which sounds like any old trailer for a summer blockbuster.

And there's DLC, if you want it.

Ultimately, Extinction is one of those games best described as being good in theory, but bad in execution.  There are some cool ideas here and the presentation is nice, but the gameplay is trash.  It's sad, because there is a good game under there somewhere.  Pass if you can.